tick. tick. tick. tick.

I guess I should backtrack to Tuesday...

I posted about the low amniotic fluid level problem we were having, and I how I was supposed to stay well hydrated and rested. Well, I tried, but I was sick all day. As most of you probably know, I have not thrown up since I was 4 or 5 years old... That was over 20 years ago. Well, that record was broken on Tuesday. For the first (and second, and third, and fourth) time, I did it. So much for staying hydrated, right? So on Wednesday morning I called in to the midwives' office to see what they thought I should do, and they wanted me to go into Labor & Delivery to have my fluid levels checked and do another NST and stuff... so we went as soon as Jack was done with class around 4:00. Everything looked great and my AFI was up from 7 cm to 14 cm, to a totally normal and safe level! The nurses said to keep up whatever I had been doing because it was working to get my fluid levels up. Well, I don't exactly think being sick and throwing up is a great way to get any fluid levels up and I certainly don't want to continue it. But really I attribute it to a priesthood blessing from Jack and prayers from lots of family members. So, we went home again and I've been feeling a lot better, until the past few hours. Not so great now, but I'm hoping it passes soon.

I went in for my regular weekly midwife appointment today. They did the group B strep test and she asked if I wanted to be "checked" too... sure. So, she did and the first thing she said was, "Wow, this baby is low!" Yep, I thought so too. She said I was at a 0 station! Then she said I was 70% effaced and dilated to 3 cm! Yike! They had talked about inducing me at 39 weeks (which I didn't want to do) if the fluid levels are still low, but then she said I probably won't even make it that long so we don't have to worry about it. She said I could possibly be having a baby in the next day or two, though I don't think it will be that soon. And then as she was leaving she said, "See you back next week, unless we see you at the hospital before then!" Ahhh! Really!?! While I am excited to meet this little baby boy soon, I was kinda planning on having another three weeks or so! My mom doesn't get here until Oct 4th. And I am just not ready!

I called Jack after my appointment and told him the news, and then called and talked to my mom. She looked online and found a decent price on a one-way ticket to come out here on Saturday. Whew! I'm feeling much better about things now, knowing she'll be here. I just can't imagine bringing home a new baby AND having a Jackson to take care of still and trying to do it all myself. And even if it is a week or more from now, it'll be nice to have her here, especially if I'm still feeling as yucky as I have been and am now. My house is a little less than clean, and I don't even remember the last time I cooked a real meal.

I think Jackson has sensed that something is changing around here. We've talked about having a baby and read the "I'm a big brother" book and everything, but I'm sure he doesn't really get it... and he certainly doesn't get the implications of it all. But I think he knows something is happening. He has been way more clingy than normal lately. It could have something to do with me leaving him for different appointments almost every day. He's generally ok at home, but as soon as I mention him going to play with friends or we go to a place with other people, he clings to my hand or arm or leg and says over and over and over and over, "Mom right here? Mom right here? Mom right here?" as if he wants me to assure him that Mom is right here and is not leaving him. He does the same thing at bedtime when I am cuddling him and when I go to lay him down in his crib. Fortunately the crying doesn't last more than a few seconds after I leave the room (crossing my fingers that it doesn't get worse!), but it is still sad. I'm still here, kiddo! And you'll always be my baby!

So things are going to happen, and possibly soon. I've decided that I need to change my attitude (a lot easier to do now that my mom is coming sooner). Baby will be born on his birthday, whenever that may be. I am ready and excited. Pretty sure it won't be tomorrow or the next day, and I'm just fine with that. But come on baby, I'm ready when you are!